HOW TO RECOGNIZE PORN USE


How do you find out if someone in your home is using pornography?  Even though this is an issue none of us want to deal with, it is something we need to be aware regarding.  This is not advocating a witch hunt - trying to read every signal and key stroke.  But those who are using pornography need to get help to get out of that trap - and the family needs to get that issue out of the house.  So, here are some things to look for.  This is far from exhaustive, and there are often other explanations for some of these points.  But if several of these indicators are found, perhaps it is a warning sign.  [WARNING: Mature Adult Topics to be Discussed Below]

  1. Increased Computer Usage, Especially at Unusual Times:  A person who is developing a porn problem will begin to frequent his/her source of porn more often as teh problem gets worse.  If the computer is the source (which it so often is), the computer usage will escalate.  What used to be a short visit to check e-mail and headlines becomes hours of surfing.  This usage will begin to be done at unusal times (when no one is awake, when no one is in the room, when no one else is home).  And if someone shows up unexpectedly, the user will have to make quick motions to switch web pages or programs.
  2. Jittery and/or Agitated When on Computer: When the person is using the computer, and you wander in the room, they will often be ill at ease, trying to act like they were just doing normal web stuff.
  3. Increased Sexual Appetite in Teens: This may be hard to pick up on as a parent, but there are some signs.  As a teen sees more porn, they will become more fascinated by it.  They will begin to be drawn to shows, movies, music, and conversations about it.  They also will probably become more physical in the treatment of their boyfriend/girlfriend. 
  4. Decreased Sexual Appetite in Adult Males:  The flip side is true for adults.  Men reach their sexual peak at 18 years old.  After that, there is a decrease in sexual energy.  If a great deal of that is spent looking at porn and masturbating, their affections for their wives will drop.  They will not pursue sex as often, and will also limit affection.
  5. Selfishness and Objectification in Sex:  Men who spend a great deal of time in the porn world will begin to treat their women like the women in pornography.  They will only really be concerned about their own satisfaction.  Much of what they will seek will be focused completely on them with little benefit to their spouse (anal, oral).
  6. Increase in Computer Viruses, Popups, and Bizarre Computer Behavior:  Porn and sex-related sites are notorious for viruses and spyware.  If you start getting a ton of viruses, weird popups, emails, or if your computer starts running really slow - porn may be a culprit.
  7. Fingerprints in Internet Explorer:  If you use Internet Explorer (which about 85% of people do), it is easy to check for porn usage.  First of all, go to the History Button.  That should pull up the history of every site visited.  If the history is empty, someone is trying to clear something.  The default setting for history is 20 days, and if you didn't change it or clear it, someone else did.  Also, you can check the Cookies and Temporary Internet Files in Explorer.  Go under Tools, and pick Internet Options.  You can view files - which will show you every file that was seen while browsing.  If that is empty and you didn't empty it (which you should do from time to time), someone may be hiding something.  Viewing the cookies (which come us as "Text File" format) can also show you fingerprints from visited sites.



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